Warning: this page may have spelling and grammer errors, will I fix them for you? probably not.



Friday, October 26, 2012

The Clothesline Project

Twice a year at UVU they have an event that is called the Clothesline project. This is an even about abuse that goes on in Utah and its and event that can open your eyes if you let it. People who are abused are given a t-shirt to do with as they please, to write or draw a picture, things like that. Then these shirts are hung up around the room for people to read. The shirts are not edited so you get the full emotion from the person. The colors of the shirts mean things too.
White= individuals who died as a result of violent acts.
yellow= survivors of domestic violence and other forms of physical assault
Red, Pink or Orange= survivors of rape or sexual assault
Blue, Green= Survivors of incest or child hood sexual abuse
Purple or Lavender= individuals attacked due to sexual orientation
Black=for individuals who became disabled as a result of an attack or where attacked because they are disabled
Gray= survivors of verbal and or emotion abuse
Brown=Survivors of spiritual abuse

It looks a little like this, only image an entire grade ballroom full of these, full of shirts that each have a different story.  While you are walking around they are playing a tape with different sounds and each sound that goes off has a different meaning to go along with it. Here is the paragraph from the handout they gave you before walking though.

The gong is struck to indicate someone is being battered. Women are battered every 10-12 second in the United States, The whistle is being blown to indicate a reported rape. Keep in mind that most rapes are not reported. Every minute of every day more than one woman reports being raped in this country. The bell is rung to indicate that a woman has been killed in a violent attack. In the United States 3 to 4 women are killed by their lovers or husbands each day....

these sounds create and interesting atmosphere as you walk around and read these stories. To think that not all of these things are reported is even more astounding to me.

I realize this is kind of a sad topic but I feel like there needs to be a little more awareness. Not because I have ever been abused. I don't think I've ever been abuse only teased. I am blessed in my life and blessed to know the people I know. That doesn't mean I don't see the abuse, it doesn't mean I don't know it exists but I think it gave me an excuse to ignore the problem. In my anthropology class we were told to write just a one page summary of feelings and ideas that we got from this project and I wanted to keep mine around. So here it is. Please remember it is one persons opinion and that you should form one of your own even if it is one that is completely different than mine.


The Clothesline Project is always a hard thing for me to go to, not because I've experienced violence or abuse to myself in my life, but because it’s not something I personally like to dwell on.  I am always very overwhelmed by the sear amounts of shirts that are hanging up. I remember going a while ago and its crazy how many more there were. I actually read in the school newspaper that there are an average of one hundred fifty to two hundred shirts that get added to the huge collection each semester.  That is a sad thought in itself. Two hundred people a year or a semester making shirts. That is showing the people who are willing to acknowledge that they were abused and willing to share what happened. I can’t imagine going through anything like that in my life.
                One of the things that gets me the most are the sounds that they have going on while you are walking around reading the shirts. It makes the atmosphere seem reverent, and then when you read what they mean it strikes you how this isn't just in our community, this is a worldwide problem.  The noise, for me, is the thing that I tried to ignore, not that I really could. Every time a bell rang my heart would hurt a little more. To think of all of those poor women who thought these men loved them, thought these men would take care of and provide for them, instead they are raped, battered, or even killed. I have to wonder why a woman would stick around if a guy is abusing her, but then I’ve seen it. Not physical abuse but verbal. My friend has depression so he feels like not very many people care or love him, so when he got a girlfriend she could do anything under the son to the poor guy and he would stick around because for some reason he believed that she loved him, that she cared. For her it was more of a power play, at least from what I saw. Who knows maybe she just didn't know how to handle someone who cared for her. It is just a sad and depressing situation all around.
                I read many t-shirts that said forgiving things or confident things. They said things like “you did this to me, you hurt me, but if you hadn't I wouldn't be the woman that I am now.” Others were like “Dad I don’t think I’ll ever understand why, but I forgive you because you are my dad and I love you.” Those people who write things like that are my hero and example in life. Forgiveness is one of the hardest things in life to accomplish and I think it’s even harder when you know the person, and you know the person is supposed to love and care for you. These people are true warriors in life. I believe that and I found myself wishing I could talk to these people and let them know that even though these bad things happened to them they are good people.
                This topic is not brought up enough in this world. It isn't talked or discussed. It is a taboo on conversation, but it should be. I wonder if it was talked about more if people would be more willing to go get help if they are abused or raped. People who are abused need to know that it isn't their fault these things are happening to them, that it is the other persons actions that are bad not theirs. The thing is this topic make brings an uncomfortable feeling to the room and into people’s hearts, if you ignore it, you won’t feel uncomfortable. This is an “out of sight out of mind” type thing in my opinion. No one really wants to hear these truly devastating stories but if no one hears them they can’t be fixed and no one gets the help they need, or even want.